Story Or Series Title: A Bride for the Dark Lord
Fandom: American Pie, without the funny.
Culprit Author’s Name: CorruptedBeauty666. Repeat offender.
Full Name (plus titles if any):</B[The Bride]. She is still given no name.
Full Species(es): Mirror-Sue. She looks how you want her to look.
Hair Color (include adjectives): None given. So it’s blonde.
Eye Color (include adjectives): None given. So they’re blue.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: None given. A plate in her head.
Special Possessions (if any): None given. She can’t have that sword.
Annoying Origin: Two Death Eater parents, named —–.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: BFF with Draco. Has the Dark Lord propose to her.
Annoying Special Abilities: Lord V can’t get into her mind, and that has him puzzled. Potty-mouthed.
Other Annoying Traits: Part of a pranking-ring at Slytherin. Snape does not approve. Pansy-bashing. Maintaining that she is not special, which usually means they are.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: “Look who’s back. It’s the unfunny. Read the rest of this entry »
Story Or Series Title: A Bride for the Dark Lord
Fandom: School of Magic Bad Pranks.
Culprit Author’s Name: CorruptedBeauty666. Repeat offender.
Full Name (plus titles if any): —. I shit you not. She is given no name. I’ll just call her the Bride.
Full Species(es): Mirror-Sue. She looks how you want her to look.
Hair Color (include adjectives): None given. So it’s blonde.
Eye Color (include adjectives): None given. So they’re blue.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: None given. A plate in her head.
Special Possessions (if any): None given. She can’t have that sword.
Annoying Origin: Two Death Eater parents, named —.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: BFF with Draco. Has the Dark Lord propose to her.
Annoying Special Abilities: Lord V can’t get into her mind, and that has him puzzled. Potty-mouthed.
Other Annoying Traits: Part of a pranking-ring at Slytherin. Snape does not approve. Pansy-bashing. Maintaining that she is not special, which usually means they are.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: It’s getting worse. Read the rest of this entry »
Story Or Series Title: A Bride for the Dark Lord
Fandom: Still no Harry, only an Heir to the throne of Whining.
Culprit Author’s Name: CorruptedBeauty666. Repeat offender.
Full Name (plus titles if any): —. I shit you not. She is given no name. I’ll just call her the Bride.
Full Species(es): Mirror-Sue. She looks how you want her to look.
Hair Color (include adjectives): None given. So it’s blonde.
Eye Color (include adjectives): None given. So they’re blue.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: None given. A plate in her head. A bunch of annoying OC-friends.
Special Possessions (if any): None given. She can’t have that sword.
Annoying Origin: Two Death Eater parents, named —.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: BFF with Draco. Has the Dark Lord propose to her.
Annoying Special Abilities: Lord V can’t get into her mind, and that has him puzzled. Potty-mouth.
Other Annoying Traits: Part of a pranking-ring at Slytherin. Snape does not approve. Pansy-bashing. Maintaining that she is not special, which usually means they are.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: This is the show that never ends, my friends. Read the rest of this entry »
Here, have an invite to the do of the year!
B>Story Or Series Title: A Bride for the Dark Lord
Fandom: Well, it looked to be Harry, but it appears to be the Bride’s teenage-years.
Culprit Author’s Name: CorruptedBeauty666. Repeat offender.
Full Name (plus titles if any): —. I shit you not. She is given no name. I’ll just call her the Bride.
Full Species(es): Mirror-Sue. She looks how you want her to look.
Hair Color (include adjectives): None given. So it’s blonde.
Eye Color (include adjectives): None given. So they’re blue.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: None given. A plate in her head. A bunch of OC-friends who are as irritating as she is.
Special Possessions (if any): None given. She can’t have that sword.
Annoying Origin: Two Death Eater parents, named —.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: BFF with Draco, who has been warped beyond recognition. Has the Dark Lord propose to her.
Annoying Special Abilities: Lord V can’t get into her mind, and that has him puzzled. Potty-mouth.
Other Annoying Traits: Part of a pranking-ring at Slytherin. Snape does not approve. Pansy-bashing. Maintaining that she is not special, which usually means they are.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: It starts out decently enough.
“FUCK ALL OF YOU” Giant orgy! I shouted as I closed the door with a bang “What the hell is everyone’s problem, I just want to live my life the way I want to live my life, not as a sex toy or a showcase for someone who won’t ever care for me.” But what other use do you have?
Yes, this is just as is. Seriously.
That last part I muttered under my breath. This was getting tiring; every day this month I had the same argument with my parents. For some unknown reason the Dark Lord, better known as He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, has told my parents that he wanted the “pleasure” He didn’t know either what the pleasure of this arrangement would be. of marrying me. Their only daughter!!! Normal parents would die *raises eyebrow* so that I wouldn’t have to but no, I got stuck with pureblood Death Eaters who think I should be flattered beyond belief. They could have sent you to Mordor, though I don’t like to think of what Sauron could have used you for. As I sat on my desk and looked around my room I felt tears start to form around my eyes. I never had a bad life, well until now. There was never any love between me and my parents so I can’t say there was any love lost between us Department of Redundancy Department? I’m calling you by phone to inform and let you know of a redundancy. because of the arguments. They only cared about each other, power and wealth. They supported Voldemort; in fact they were only second to Serverus Snape, the Dark Lord’s closest Death Eater. But do your parents give the footrubs Snape does? Yeah, that’s right I said Voldemort, V-O-L-D-E-M-O-R-T. I wasn’t sacred of him dear, you’ll never be holy to him, after all deep down he was just a man before he was just a hatstand or something like that, himself. Anyway my parents gave me things to make up for not being there for me. Every birthday or holiday I can remember I have spent alone or with my friends. They’ve showered me with gifts not because they cared about me but so I could not say they were awful parents, so they could play the guilt card whenever they needed to. Do you know what I mean? Like they could say the whole “we spent so much money on you and this is how you repay us?” thing whenever I wouldn’t do what they wanted me to do. Make up your mind. Your parents neglect you and marry you off. Do you, or don’t you, have a bad life? I had only one more month left of school vacation; actually I only had two weeks left. She’s not smart with the numbers-thing. She needs to take her shoes off to count to twenty. It was my last year at Hogwarts, after I graduated the wedding would be that summer. I heard the doorbell ring, it was probably some Death Eaters wanting to congratulate me because they thought that since I was going to be the Dark One’s bride I would have as much power or influence over him, so the idiots would all gather trying to suck up. With that attitude, you won’t have authority over the burger-clerk I had thought and thought it over why did the Dark Lord choose me? He hates you, and wants to kill you with some form of exquisite torture. I was a looker and I knew that but there were plenty of other girls prettier then me, actually when I think about it I’m pretty average. I’m smart but not as smart as that damn Hermione Granger. Smartest Witch of her Year. Deal with it. And when you think about it I was not even a strong follower, I was even against the idea of killing people because when you get down to it, it’s wrong. I don’t even have any hatred for Muggles or Mudbloods, or anything different. What does he see in me!?! I wasn’t anything special. Though he did seem a little surprised when he couldn’t get inside my mind that one time I met him. Lord V goes house-calling? And he couldn’t because you don’t have a brain, just a void of entitledness And there’s another thing, I only met him ONCE!!! When did he realize that I was the one? He realised you could whine Harry to death.That thought was actually funny; if I can find humor in this situation then I really must be insane. I wanted to scream out loud but we had guests and if I learned anything from my parents it was that if your world is crumbling around you don’t let other people know.
I heard a knock on my door; and I bet it was going to be one of those ass suckers I was just talking about. I found my voice and managed to look like I was looking at some bridal goth magazines before I said “Come in.”
Sure enough there was Pansy something-or-rather She’s dating your BFF. Learn her name and oddly Draco Malfoy ,b>who’s dating Pansy who I didn’t have anything against, we got along very well and he was one of my dearest friends. It was Pansy I couldn’t stand. She tried a little too hard at everything. She put on a little too much make-up, revealed a little too much skin, tried a little too hard to act like she was all that. She was just one of those girls the pretended that she was something that she just wasn’t. At least she’s not having to pretend to be canon
“——-!!!” Pansy screamed as she gave me a bone-crushing hug, behind her I saw Draco make a face and mouth out of putty, “Quick give her something shiny, maybe we can distract her and jump out the window!” I grinned, I had missed my friends, and they were the only thing that made my life worth living. Living da vida loca!
“Hey.” I started “I didn’t know it was you guys downstairs, I would have come down with the plague.”
Pansy who had finally let me get some air said, “Oh we didn’t mind, we were going to come and gossip anyway, right?” as she started to laugh that weird high-pitched one, she seems to use for special occasions when she wanted to suck up pretty badly. Hands up who ever saw that happen in canon?
I saw Draco roll his eyes and say, “Shut up Pansy.”
I had to laugh at that one. Pansy didn’t get that Draco didn’t like her and because of that, every chance she got she would throw herself at him. The bashing, precious… I grabbed my wand and did the hand flick to get some chairs for them to sit in. As the three of us sat down, Pansy started to enlighten us on the gossip on what was going on this summer, you know the usual stuff, who had hooked up, whose party not to miss, and who’s wearing what, whose parents got caught and were now in Azkaban. Just the usual teenage pureblood soon-to-be death eater stuff. I knew it wouldn’t be long before I would have to talk about the wedding so when Pansy said, “Anyways ——–, I have been talking too much, why don’t you tell me and Drakie,” I saw Draco cringe at the hated nickname, “about the wedding,” I wasn’t surprised.
Okay I can do this, just smile and get it over with. I forced a big fake cherry smile and said, “All I know is what my parents have told me, and that’s pretty much that the Dark Lord has asked for my hand in marriage.” Pansy squealed in delight, she then started to gush about how if Voldemort had asked him to marry her she would tell everyone but that since I was so modest about such things she would completely understand why I didn’t want to spill the details. What details? That the wedding will be in Vegas, with Lord V dressed as Elvis and the Bride as Priscilla, Queen of the Desert?
“So ——–, where is the ring?” she asked.
“Well, I haven’t answered the Dark Lord yet, we only heard two weeks ago and we haven’t had time to answer.” I replied. Before she could say anything I heard her mother call her and of course as good manners required I had to go downstairs with her. Draco stayed up in my room, knowing I would be back. He would probably want to talk about the look I had on my face, when Pansy had asked about the ring. I had a momentary lack of control there and I had felt myself tearing up. After I had dropped of Pansy and said good-bye to her and her parents I went back up to my room. Our house was exceptionally large so it took me a bit. When I got back I saw Draco on the bed and oddly enough he was looking at one of those damned bridal magazines.
Mini-snip as the Bride-to-be angst about marriage and commitment. And she has no intention of ever bonking Draco. Small relief there.
“I have an idea,” I heard myself say. Draco looked up at me and asked what it was. “Get the gang together, before we get on the Express, this is very important and everyone has to be there.” He smirked because I wasn’t the one to usually have ideas. I stuck out my tongue in a very childish gesture and before I could say anything a voice shouted up…Oohh…a cliffhanger. How exciting. [/dull voice]
There’s more, but that’ll come later.
I have a deep and abiding love for good writing. I adore reading, and even though being on the ‘Net has cut into my reading habits something fierce, I still can’t give it up. I was the kid who spent all her free time in the school-library. I have a wish to write myself, but…
I only recently got into the whole fanfic-thing, by following a link on a message-board to Deleterius, and this has quite killed that wish. Seeing some of the things that pass for fiction that appear in the Pit just make my brain melt. I know, it says a lot about my self-esteem that I let some illiterate teenager get to me like this, but I never said I was the most confident person alive. Luckily, some of my sanity got saved by also running into respectively OFUM, and the original PPC-series. But still, but still, I’m quite unsure as to how to go about writing. (Apart from just doing it, of course, but I’m also quite lazy.)
If there was a point to this, I wouldn’t know. I’m just rambling, obviously.
Nienna Telcontar, Warrior!Sue with the Ring of Barahir
What my fiancé said about this fic, when I showed it to him: “It’s said that an infinite number of monkeys using an infinite number of typrewriters could produce the collected works of Shakespeare, given enough time. Frankly, one monkey with one typewriter is not going to cut it,… and it would write better than that.” She’s horrible, just horrible.
What really bugs me? She’s obviously read the books. And she still writes this Valar-forsaken piece of claptrap.
Title: The story of a princess shield
Fandom: The box says Lord of the Rings. I call it false advertising.
CulpritAuthor: IceBend28
Full Name (plus titles if any): Nienna Telcontar.
Full Species(es): Human. Warrior!Timetravelling!Sue. I’m fearing 311 Walkers-fic.
Hair Color (include adjectives): Not mentioned, I’m assuming black.
Eye Color (include adjectives): Not mentioned, I’m assuming grey.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: Not mentioned.
Special Possessions (if any): Ring of Barahir, Andúril, 300 Gondorian soldiers.
Annoying Origin: Claims kinship to Aragorn and Arwen.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: The aforementioned King and Queen of Gondor, who should have drowned her at birth.
Annoying Special Abilities: Elvish senses.
Other Annoying Traits: Mucks with canon, temporal and geographical distortions. Able to best her father in a duel. Random capitalisation. Random POV-changes. Bad emoetry.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:
Prologue
A tall man waited outside a door with his three children waiting for a certain sound to be heard. He was a proud honorable man for his Name was King Aragorn Elessar of Gondor. His eldest child was Prince Elldarion, Who has taken the place of Eldarion His youngest children so far was Princess Celbrian And Arwen’d consent to naming a child after her mother, why? Elves don’t do that. and Estel Hrmph. Then all four of them heard the sound that they were waiting for, a babies wail. Then as they wished it a nurse appeared out of thin air carrying out a baby girl and handed the baby over to her father, the king. When she looked up she smiled and giggled to see her daddy’s face and he laughed. Precocious little tyke, isn’t she?
Then Aragorn said, “I shall Name thee Nienna which means sorrowful Strong”. Euhm, what? Being made King must have robbed Aragorn of his senses. Naming a child after one of the Valar? Like Hell, he would. And the closest translation we have of Nienna’s name is ‘She Who Weeps.’
Then he walked into the room and to his wife’s bedside and told her the child’s name and was promptly bitchslapped by an outraged Arwen.
Chapter one: Sixteen years latter
Training hall
A girl and a boy were squaring off each other using sandblasters to get rid of the rough edges, attacking and parrying here and there. The girl by the looks of it was winning. All of a sudden the sword flew out of the boys hand and landed a few feet back but before he could get it the girl’s sword tip was presented at his neck. He had lost.
“Do you Yield?” she asked.
“Yes, I yield.” He replied. No use arguing with a Sue. She’ll just tantrum.
Then she picked up his sword and gave it to him. All of a sudden she spun around to hear applause at her victory. For she beat the best of the boys swordsmen, her brother, Elldarion. And Eldarion is still safe in canon-land. She smiled to see that her father was there to see one of her victories She beat her brother. Spectacular. and walked over to him and bowed for he was King Elessar and she is was Princess Nienna.
He said, “I well named you strong, Mistress.”
“And you Papa are well named Elfstone.” What does this have to do with anything? She retorted.
Then he brightened up and said, “I have two gifts to give you. I give my ring Barahir, from the days before the War of the Ring, and the sword Anduril.”
“Why Give me this sword and ring for I am not the heir.” Asked Nienna. Wow, a small glimmer of intelligence.
“Because this gift includes a responsibility or a job you may call it. Your new responsibility is that you are, a new captain of Gondor, And the Ring and the Sword relate to this, how, your Majesty? Inquiring sporkers want to know. Your Brother refused the gifts and asked if you could have the gifts. You’re responsible for three hundred men and women. With these three hundred men or women you are to patrol the realm.”
All right. The Ring of Barahir is the symbol of the Kingship. There’s no way in Aman that Eldarion’d refuse it. Not to mention that he’d never get the chance to refuse it. When he becomes King in 120 FA, he’ll get it. Period. And why is Aragorn giving away Andúril?
“I understand my job, Father.” I Answered. And here we start with the change in tenses. I’m going to be ill.
*snip to next morning*
Morning came bright and early as I dressed. On my belt was Anduril, an axe, and on my back were a cloak, a bow, and arrows, and on my finger was my fathers ring. Then I went to the dinning so called due to all the noise hall to eat breakfast when a servant came into her path and told her to go to soldier’s mess hall. The mess hall was loud and noisy with soldiers talking about a new captain.
A seat at the dais was empty and the other captains waved her over to sit at the empty seat.
When she sat a captain said to her, “Well me’ Lad so you’re the new captain of the second patrol. Eh? Who are ye?”
“I am Nienna and I am a girl not a lad. So I am sorry for thatbeing a Sue. Oh wait, that’s not right..” I said with a hint of sarcasm as I ate the meal.
The captain who spoke to her earlier said, “Well Lass, are you one of our princess one of them, what? Pwincess Pwecious??”
“Maybe, I don’t know. What do you think?” she replied. There are so many women named Nienna wearing Rings of Barahir around, after all.
There were nine other captains other than her. This meant that there were ten captains and the total group of men/women is 3,000, adding the captains it’s 3,010. for those who can’t count, like the Suethor.
*snip. The soldiers get sorted into patrols.*
A man shouted, “Over here newbie this is the second patrol group nicknamed the King’s Riders, I am second in command of this group, the names’ Leron.”
“The names’ most feverish wish for Nienna is for her to bugger off and leave the Vala alone,” Said Nienna, “I hope you can show me some of the ropes around here. Sue, there’s one over there. Now go hang yourself. For the rest of you, I do not want pranks and tricks played upon me because I ‘m the new one here. Now on to more important matters the king put us to. Our job is going to be ruffled feathers and muddy so pay attention. Our duty is to help the people of Edoinoras Where? Edoras? in the country of Rohan rebuild their homes due to flood.” When did she get these orders? Very nice of Gondor to help out in Rohan, but this is not the UN Peacecorps, and I don’t know how much carpenter-knowledge the troop has.
A moan from all three hundred Riders was heard from all corners of Minas Trilith. So that’s what I am dealing with, thought Nienna, a Bunch of lazy bums, who just like doing the heroics and not the jobs you get your hands dirty in. “Please, just let me speak before we go to Rohan we will make a detour to Ithillien, to deliver a message to the Prince Faramir. *weeps for the poor comma.* Thank you.”
Chapter two: Two days later.
Borders of Ithillien
I got up early the next day to start again towards Ithillien but before that they had to eat so I was to make breakfast with Leron and two others. Four people making breakfast for 300 men. And this is a Captain’s job, how? The two others introduced themselves as Kiranna and Kiron a set of fraternal twins who were the basic mirror image twins. Highly unlikely, if they’re fraternal twins.
One of the twins Kiron I believe asked, “Could you recite a poem for us, Nienna?” Because this is the most important part of being a Captain: the ability to recite poems.
“Sure. It is called Life is…a bitch and then you die. Die Sue!. I made it up myself We can tell, dearie. *snip poem.* It’s just bad and insipid. Well how do you like the poem?” I asked then I noticed that I gathered more audience then I thought because during the poem I guessed they came out of their tents to listen. Of course. Who needs sleep?
“It was powerful.” Said everyone there in unison. Sniffling bootlicking sycophants.
Later, everyone was getting on their horses; I saw that someone had put a note on my back that said ‘kick me.’ Kick Me’-notes? This is the Gondorian Army, not high school! *my fiancé*: Pranks may occur, but they’re likely to be more vicious So I went over to Leron and said, “Who do you think did this is?”
“William probably did it. He is this patrols practical joker, or clown you could say. He probably did it as a joke to keep you on your toes.” Whispered Leron and he looked at my giant booger I’d only just picked out of my nose on my finger. “Permission, to speak freely, mam?” She’s too young to be your mother, sonny.
“Permission granted Leron.” I replied, suddenly the feeling that I will regret my agreement came over me.
“Are you perchance Princess Nienna?” See the astounding perceptiveness of the typical Gondorian soldier! Like her father dropping by to tell everyone to take it easy on her wasn’t hint enough. Or her name!
“Yes.” Then he gaped at me in wonder, so I walked to my horse and got on.
I went to the front of the line and rallied my group. Then Leron rode up to meet her and said, “Why at the very least you did not at least tell me I could understand why you didn’t tell the others.”
“I did not tell you because you may act like I’m all that important and royal, I hate that.” Liar, liar, pants on fire!
And that I thought, would be the end of that discussion.
*snip arriving at Faramir’s castle, after a few hours of riding. Sue gets greeted by Faramir, Éowyn and their twin-children, Erin and Boromir. Nienna has a conversation with daughter Erin about who Nienna’s going to marry. *
As the day drawn to a close I had to get ready for a ball they had planned A.) To let me meet new people, B.) For me to share the Message in front of the whole entire Ithillien court. I first took a bath because I had not taken one for a couple of days. I quickly slipped into my black and silver dress the colors of the royal house of Gondor. After I put on the dress I put a black velvet cape on my back and to secure the cape I put a silver brooch threw the top corners. I then put a belt on that held my sword Anduril, and then put the ring Barahir on my finger. Finally I put silver tiara like crown on my head. They’re travelling to Rohan to help out, but she has time to go to a ball? And she lugged her fancy clothes around with her?
The palace’s ballroom was splendid looking. There were well carved stair cases with intricate designs drawn on the railings. There were balconies with flowers growing all over the railings and wall. Arches surrounded the ballroom a big candle chandelier was in the middle of the ceiling, a band to left and to the right a table set with trays of food was what she Who? Bloody POV-shifts. saw when she walked into the room it was also already packed and hard to breathe in.
Too crowded, just to see me, I thought. My thoughts exactly. Where did everyone come from, anyway? When was all this arranged?
Then Faramir announced, “Our royal guest has a message to deliver to us, Ithilliens.”
“I am Princess Nienna of Gondor, and my message is just to warn you, you who care I mean, that the Queen Arwen is pregnant with a boy.” I said. A. There was only one son born to Aragorn and Arwen: Eldarion. B. Why is this a warning?
Then the ball continued, with people talking and saying, “Wow, five children the biggest family in Gondor’s royal house yet, but I thought their fifth child would be a girl too. But having a boy is still wonderful too.” An heir and a spare. Luvverly.
The dance lasted all night. Many men asked to dance with me but I refused to some that I thought that might not be so wise to dance with. Why? A little explanation would be nice.
Chapter three: Rohan
Our first stop in Rohan was Edoras to ask permission to give help to the town My apologies, Edoinoras isn’t a misspelling then. that flooded. When we got to Edoras there was a big welcome for us. As we reached Meadusil Meduseld, I bowed low to King Eomer and Queen Lothloreil Lothlíriel, and to their son (I Forget his name at the moment and yet you mention it in the next sentence. It’s called proofreading, and acquiring a beta.). King Eomer said to me, “You do not need to bow to me Nienna, you and your groups help is more the welcome to me who is swamped with a lot more problems already, but I would have you take my son, Elfwine, with you. Deep breaths, Éomer king. He knows the land better than you do.” He then left with his queen to let me talk to Elfwine alone.
“Suilad, it mean greetings in Sindarin. My name is Nienna Telcontar. My last name means Strider.” I said uneasily not knowing what do next or what to say. Because I’m always assuming I have to be condescending about the fact I speak Sindarin.
“So you are the little rascal that everyone talks about at Gondor’s court. Always running about with sword in hand, helping others where it doesn’t concern you.” Said Elfwine looking at his fingers. Brat.
“Well, I thought you would have more manners than what they say at court. They say you have less manners than a horses behind, not only that they say that you are uncoothed, stupid, and makes the wrong decisions. They also say you would make a very bad king. Mîbo orch! (Go kiss an orc). Á lasta lalienya! (Listen to my laughter!) Holmelya ná ve orco! (Your smell is like an orc!).” I replied as I cursed down the hall. Double brat. And stop it with the in-sentence translations! She has paid more attention to her swords-master than to the master of etiquette, I see. Very diplomatic, and she got sent here, because…?
“What the heck did you say in elvish, the ‘dead language’?” Elfwine said and walked out of the rooms. Elves might be Fading from the world, but they’re not gone yet. Eru, there’s a whole lot of them living in Ithilien! Your name means ‘Elf-friend’! Why treat it like ancient Sumerian?
*snip* Elfwine gets sent out with Nienna’s troops, and they head for the flooded town. Night falls, and they set up camp in the westfold. There’s whining by Elfwine, and an admonishment by Nienna.*
I had a strange dream. It was like walking into reality in the past that was not true now. Bwuh? But when I woke up I saw the roof of the tent and I was heavy with sweat. So I changed into my riders outfit and walked out of my tent and started to take down my tent like everyone else. Today I felt like something was going to happen. Something extraordinary and unusual. We mounted our horses and started riding after a quick break for breakfast.
The horses were rest less and frightened of something we and the horses did not know. A mist started Oh, my sweet Dark Powers! Have you come to release Middle-earth from the Sue and dump her in the Demiplane of Dread? Falkovnia’s nice this time of year, and they can always use more fighters. gathering as we rode to the center it came to a sudden end, but the mist was still behind us and then it disappeared and it was a sunny forest. A sunny forest? Where did that come from? Beats us. There’s no forest where you’ve gone to. But my elvish senses told me that I was in the past and not in Rohan anymore. Oh no, you don’t. What elvish senses? Arwen being your mother does not make you a half-elf. She gave up her immortality for love, and hence her offspring are, for all intents and purposes, human. Besides, Galadriel was the Seer of the family, and she’d be disgusted to find out you’re her great-granddaughter. So I told them that and they agreed upon that now all we had to do was to figure out where we are, what year, and how to get back. Also note that none of them panic, or worry about sorcery of any kind. No, we just believe what our Captain-of-the-awful-poems tells us. Sheep!
But our first problem was to get out of the forest. So we decided to go west, first. It took us two hours to get to the edge of the forest. At the edge of the forest there was a pretty old road. So we decided to go down the road. It was an hour before we ran into elves going the opposite way and asked them to stay with our group for the night and the elves accepted the offer. Why aren’t the Elves weary of a troop of 300 soldiers suddenly appearing in their path? Gondorian soldiers, a long way from home?
I asked one elf while we were making dinner, where we were. He said we were near Rivendale not to be confused with Rivendell, which is where canon was headed., and if we continued down the road for two days we would find a path to get across there and say Glorfindal sent us. Elrond was to hold a council there in a month. I then asked Glorfindal what day and year it was because we lost track of time, which was true to some degree. He said it was the twelfth of October of the year of the third age, 3018. No, no, no. On the 12th of October Glorfindel was near the Last Bridge, securing it for Aragorn and the Hobbits. There was no plan for a frigging Council at this point. Why does he tell this to a complete stranger, anyway? And the Council took place on the 25th of October, which is two weeks from this date. Oh, wait, this is Glorfindal, his naïve and stupid twin-brother. No wonder.
So mother and father are alive in this time period and we are twenty-eight years into the past, I thought. Then the elves started to sing to us in return of our hospitality. They sang;
“Lairë Telcontaro
Ilya i ná malta úmirilya,
lá ilyë yantë ranya nar vanwë;
i tulca enwinawë úquela, nurë sundar arahtier lá ringwenen.
Erinillon nárë núva coivana,
cala lumbellon tuiuva;
encarna núva macil i né rácina,
i úrína ata núva aran.”
*snip translation of poem, since it’s what Bilbo wrote about the Dúnedain. ‘All that’s gold does not glitter.’*
The next morning our guest The other Elves had legged it when they saw Nienna for the Sue she was. left us to ponder our thoughts.
“Who was the riddle talking about?” Wondered Leron aloud.
“It was talking about my father, Leron, in the days before my father became king he was a dunedian Dúnedain chieftain. He had many names in Bree he was known as Strider. To the elves of Rivendale he was Estel. In Rohan he was known as Throngol Thorongil. He’s your father, get his names straight.. In Gondor he is known as Elessar the Elfstone. But his true name is Aragorn II son of Arathorn II. He’s been King for 27 years. One would think his subjects know his father’s name by now. In this time period he is known as Aragorn or Strider.” I told Leron and the others.
We then decided to pack up camp and head on to Rivendale. The rode was long and rough. The pebbles in our horses shoes made us stop numerous times and by the twentieth time we stopped people were starting to get annoyed and grumpy. It was not a pleasant journey, nor was it the next day. Take the stones out, then. Bloody animal-abuse, this is.
After stopping for the day, I led a hunting party into the woods What woods? We’re at the footfalls of the Misty Mountains here. Scarce in forest. and came back with three deer for 302 people? Yeah, right. and handed them to the people in our group to butcher them. After the deer were butchered we cooked the deer. That was when something strange happened. It sounded like a high pitched scream but I knew it was the Ringwraiths. How? They were gone by the time you were born. After 5 minutes of waiting we saw them. They came riding down the road beside us and they didn’t even notice us. No, they didn’t bother you, since they care about the Ring for now. Not the same thing. That was a big wake up call for my men.
The next day we arrived at Rivendale and told the guards that Glorfindale Glorfindel’s other twin-brother. His parents had little imagination when it came to naming children. told us to come here. Me and my men and Elfwine met Elrond. It was weird meeting my grandfather. He was a tall even among elves, he had dark hair, and sea gray eyes.
“Welcome, to Rivendale, Captain Nienna Telcontar and you riders. Please make your self comfortable. In a couple of days there Glorfindal said ‘In a month.’ Why is she getting invited to a Council that at this point wasn’t even planned yet? will be a council and you captain and one of your friends may join you. My elves will show your riders to the barracks Rivendell has barracks? When did the Last Homely House turn into a military garrison? And again, why does no-one question the appearance of 300 Gondorian soldiers? How come Elrond isn’t surprised at her A. sharing the name of a Vala, B. sharing the name of Aragorn, when he knows the ranger doesn’t have children, or any siblings., and my daughter, Arwen So she’ll have something to do besides being pretty. will show you captain to your rooms.” Said the Elf lord.
While Arwen (my mothers younger self No, really?) was leading me to my rooms I asked her questions about Rivendale. When we ran into my Dad’s younger self. I notice my mother blush and helped him up. They’ve been in a relationship for about forty years. One would think the stage of hopeless infatuation is over by now. Dad turned twords me and asked, “Who are you?”
“I am Nienna.”
“Nienna do you know how to use the sword by your side?” Father said scornfully. And Chauvinistic!Aragorn rides again! He shouldn’t even be here. Oh wait, that’s canon again.
He doesn’t believe I can use the sword, two he doesn’t even notice who the sword is There’s no such thing as intelligent swords in Middle-earth, dearie. And Narsil doesn’t get reforged until mid-December. What does this mean for the Ring of Barahir, though? There’s now two copies of it around., I thought.
“Yes of course, why else would I wear it? If it’s a challenge you want it’s a challenge you’ll get.” I said as I unsheathed my blade.
“Very well, I accept your challenge.”
We squared off in the hall, it was a brilliant fight but I knew more tricks then he could guess. In the end I won. *brain breaks.* Here we have a mere chit of a girl, fighting a man who’s way more experienced than she is, what with defending the North and all, who can face Ringwraiths and not die on the spot, and he loses? Because she knows tricks? Tell me, Sue, can you play dead? Now, can you go off and die? I was shown to my rooms.
Taking a bath never felt so good. It felt weird not being able to call my mom and dad by those names. What names?
I feel something more than just a headache coming on. This fic made my head explode.
*sporker gets carted off to the Houses of Healing for recovery.*
Anastasia, the lady-like Sue
I really didn’t like this one. She’s not as bad as other Sues that have been sporked here, but she just set my teeth on edge, especially with the whole ‘Lady-like, yet knew how to have fun!’-schtick she has going on. It just…yrch.
Story Or Series Title: First Daughter Hogwarts? Why are you asking us?
Fandom: The boy who could do without Tranfers
CulpritAuthor’s Name: ILoveCheeseyMoments
Full Name (plus titles if any): Anastasia, First Daughter
Full Species(es): Witch, Sparklypoo with hints of Tootsitramp. Transfer!Sue.
Hair Color (include adjectives): Brown hair.
Eye Color (include adjectives): Deep blue eyes.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: Not specified.
Special Possessions (if any): Gobs of money.
Annoying Origin: Her Muggle-father, who rules the Free World.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Gets taught by Professor McGonagall, the balls of every boy she meets, Harry’s in particular.
Annoying Special Abilities: Learns six years of magic in a month. Turns Hedwig into a male. Flies side-broom. Knows how to please guys, but is more a romantic girl.
Other Annoying Traits: Has apparently never set foot outside Washington D.C, and just squees over everything British. Can’t use punctuation to save her life. Is a bombshell.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: Gladly.
Disclaimer – I do not own Harry Potter, but I do own the plot. Can you even own plots?
Spending what he hoped to be the last summer he would ever have to spend at the Dursley’s house, Harry pondered on the decision of returning to his true home, Hogwarts. Harry Loved Hogwarts but what was Hogwarts without Dumbledore? Who would he turn to when he had questions about the Dark Arts? What if Dumbledore had more to tell him that could help him defeat Voldemort? No wizard or witch knew as much as Dumbledore. They one person he could turn to was professor McGonagall. She surly because she so dislikes everybody did not know as much as Voldemort but was very bright. Thank God for small favours. But, she held stuff back from Harry. Her relationship with Harry was not as Harry’s and Dumbledore’s relationship. Dumbledore treated Harry as an adult and let him know everything he knew. But Professor McGonagall kept a student teacher relationship where there are many things she knows but does not feel Harry is mature enough to know. And this was different from Dumbledore, how? Even he did not tell harry everything in one go.
It will never be the same, I won’t be happy their. I have to kill Voldemort. I can not return to school until my task as “the chosen one” is completed! Harry was shocked by the fact that he referred to himself as “the chosen one”. He was used to hearing this name used by the members of the ministry or reading it in the Daily Prophet, but not used by him.
This was how he spent his whole summer. Thinking. Who needs sleeping or eating? That’s for wusses! Ron and Hermione are my two best friends and the best thing that ever happened to me. They make me happy and keep me sane. I can not leave them. They’re coming along with you, nitwit. You can’t leave them. Good to see there’s people around to keep you sane. Now, if they can only get you out of this fic.
Although, I know they will not return to school if I don’t. They deserve a better future with successful careers. I have to go back for the sake on my friends. Yes, I’m going back to Hogwarts. Hooray! *blinks* Never mind that if he doesn’t go after Voldemort, his friends certainly won’t have a future. How does this parse logically?
But first I have to ask professor McGonagall if I could use the secrete What does it secrete? Acid, to burn away the Sue? passage way to keep in touch with the order.
*snip letters, and the sudden sex-change of Hedwig. Harry’s still mistreated by the Dursleys, writes to his friends about the reopening of Hogwarts, and gets to stay with the Grangers. The Dursleys party all night because Harry’s leaving for good. How touching.*
Meanwhile in the Whitehouse…
“But daddy they must have security!” begged Anastasia.
“Not enough for my daughter, not enough for the first daughter!” her father replied in anger.
“You have no idea sir” Professor McGonagall jumped in.“Yes, Hogwarts isn’t safe enough for Anastasia.”
“Listen I said no to that man with the big beard when he showed up six years ago, sending you would not make a difference”
“He did not send me sir, he passed away last year, and I now take his place as headmistress of Hogwarts. Anastasia was the only witch or wizard ever to not attend a magical school. Sadly, this gets explained later on. It still doesn’t make sense. Dumbledore wanted her to come to Hogwarts” Professor McGonagall said with sadness in her voice. ”I did not agree with this, at all. “The security is the best in the wizarding world. A no muggles or non magical folks know of it. Apart from the Dursleys, the Grangers, and all the other Muggle parents. No on in the wizarding world cares about her place in society in the muggle world. She will be treated as an equal.” *snorts* We should be so lucky.
“Daddy that’s all I ever wanted, you know that! I think about the day that man came when I was eleven everyday. I know you believe in magic because your face was so shocked when you called security and he just disappeared.” Anastasia said. After this her father stood in silence thinking. Get rid of Sue, or have her stay. Get rid off, or let her stay. Hmmm… So, Anastasia and McGonagall stood in front of him desperately waiting for a reply.
“I must be crazy, but you may go” Good man. Sanest thing you did after entering politics.
“Thank you Daddy, thank you so much” she said running up to him and giving him a hug.
“You will not regret this sir” said McGonagall with a smile on her face. ”We have more than enough experience in getting rid of unwanted Sues. You will be billed later.”
“I just met you mam McGonagall is Anastasia’s grandmother?, but for some reason I trust you” I leave her in you responsibility.”
“She will return to you for Christmas break, December 18. It was very nice meeting you. Now Anastasia grab my arm and hold tight.”
Anastasia first tuned to her father and said goodbye. She then walked over to McGonagall and grabbed her arm.
“Keep her away from those English boys for me” Better to keep her away from them. He said as they vanished. So we have the president of the United States giving his daughter away to the second weirdo who shows up, claiming she’s a witch? No security-checks, no press hounding him later on where his daughter disappeared to? Does this make sense?
Then next morning Harry said good bye to his Aunt Petunia and she gave him a brief handshake. Dudley gave him a big hug out of sarcasm considering Harry was finally leaving and started setting his stuff up in Harry’s room. His uncle had a big smile on his face as he drove him to the train station and searched for Mr. Gm shook his Granger ….What?. Once Harry said, “that’s it Mr. Ganger” his uncle ran over to him, shook his hand firmly, and said, “You’ve solved all my troubles!” and quickly ran off.
“Umm, ok?” replied Mr. Granger.
“He’s a little ill in the head” Harry muttered under his breath. Touching scene. *wipes away tears.*
As they got off the train they were greeted by Hermione and her mother. They drove back to the Granger’s house and Harry put his stuff away and went downstairs to find Mrs. Granger cooking what smelled like a delicious lunch and Hermione and her father watching the news in the living room. Harry sat on an open seat on the coach while they news anchor said, “I am very sad to say our best allies America has lost twenty lives from one neighbor hood of their beloved capital Washington D.C. No one knows how they died but a Jessica Bruno, found the bodies laying in the street. The bodies consisted of both her parents and her older brother. Policemen blocked of the area and are trying to get to the bottom of the scene. None of the victims have bullet marks or any signs of being beaten.” This is just not right. Why would British news care so much about the death of twenty civilians in the US? Unless the newsreader was Tony Blair, I doubt he’d call America ‘Our best allies.’ Or talk about ‘their beloved capital.’ And how did twenty bodies transform into two parents and an older brother? It’s imortant news, yes. To the people immediately involved, not to everyone across the Atlantic. US-centric much, Suethor?
“Voldemort”, Harry muttered under his breath. Hermione had tears in her eyes.
“Is that the umm,” Hermione’s dad asked. Hermione nodded. She had told her about him many times.
“Lunch is ready!” Mrs. Granger said coming into the living room with a tray of Italian heroes I don’t know what to say to this. and a big smile on her face. Harry though of how she could make such a depressed room happy with her warming presents. presence, I can buy. Food helped too!
After they ate Hermione brought Harry into town to meet her friends.
“Harry this is Dana, Jen, and Greg, this is Harry he goes to my boarding school”
They said hello to each other and hung out. They didn’t do anything particularly exciting but Harry ha more fun then he did all summer. Harry thought it was cool that in the pizza place that everyone there knew everyone by there name and all. “New boyfriend Hermione?” More sex-changes! they asked.
As Hermione blushed she said, “No, this is my best friend Harry, he goes to my school”
“So Harry have you ever been in jail? Have any tattoos? Huh do ya, do ya, do ya?” one of the waiter asked Harry? Did he ask, or didn’t he? And why is Hermione hanging out with people like this?
*canon Hermione makes a small appeareance as she gives Harry his birthday-presents: they’re all books. Then they go clubbing…weeps*
Harry had a ball the rest of the week. He was almost sad to leave but he was very excited to see Ron and the rest of the Wesley’s. He was not very excited to see Ginny. In the past year they had a relationship and Harry ended it worrying Voldemort would hurt anyone he got to close to. He did not want to hurt her but it was his only option. Although he was crazy about her last year he got over her over the summer and did not spend too much time thinking about her. Ah, the fleetingness of teenage-relationship.
At Hogwarts McGonagall spent two weeks teaching Anastasia the basics and filling her in on wizardly affairs. Even their dinner conversations were spent talking about the history or magic. Once McGonagall thought she was ready she told Anastasia about the horrors of dark magic. She told her about Voldemort (of coarse referring to him as He Who Must Not Be Named) and of coarse, “the chosen one”. “He still attends Hogwarts and is a great student and seeker. He will be Headboy” O RLY?
“He sounds like an amazing person”
“Almost as amazing as you, you must be the first wizard I history to have learned six years worth of Hogwarts’ teaching in two weeks. *groans* Of course a few memory spells helped you but you were very quick. Your speed will keep you up with the rest of the students, yet you are no Hermione Granger” Wanna bet?
“Hermione Granger?”
“She is a student at Hogwarts, your age you grade, and it has been said she is the brightest wizard of her age.”
“O, wow”
“Yes, and o my, I almost forgot to send her the Headgirl letter. Hands up who didn’t see that coming. I must be losing it. It’s the Sueness that surrounds me. I don’t see Professor McGonagall losing her head like this otherwise. Umm, if you would like to go ride your broom, I might be a half hour; I also have to send out a few other letters.”
“I’m not in D.C. anymore!” No shit, Shirley. What gave it away? The Scottish landscape? she said with a big smile on her face and left the classroom McGonagall used to teach her potions.
As she stepped outside into the courtyard she placed her broom on the ground and practiced the command “up” forcing the broom to rise from the ground to her hand. Once she mastered it a few times she took of into the air. How dense. How can you master something a few times? Short-term amnesia much?
She decided that is was not lady like to ride with the broom in between her legs so she tried flying with both legs hanging over one side like the way her mother taught her to ride a horse, only when she rode a horse it was called side saddle. Flying side-broom? Is that possible? It’s probably the only time her legs stay together, though. She was truly a lady in everything she did. Elegance and grace were in her character. Along with this she did of course, like any American teenager, like to have fun. And she was fun a lot of it. She had fun with boys but not to much. She was more romantic but, she was American so she did know how to please a guy! She has long brown hair and deep blue eyes. She was a little below average in height falling around five foot one, but that made her cute and her excellent figure helped make her the bombshell she was. Uh, yeah. She sounds like a romantic slut.
She entered and slowly got off her broom.
“That old broom won’t do. We will get a new one tomorrow when we get your school supplies” said McGonagall.
“Umm, I don’t have any money” Now she worries about that. Stupid bint.
“Your father sent a fortune for you which I had Hadgrid exchange for wizarding gold at the bank.” I’m sure Gringott’s does exchanges, or else Muggle-born witches and wizards wouldn’t be able to buy supplies. Which makes me wonder if they also get counsillors to help them with the transition to the magical world. Interesting idea, that.
That day Mr. and Mrs. Weasley took Ron, Ginny, Harry, and Hermione to Diagon Alley.
They used floo powder to get there. Once they got there they got their books. They then went to Fred and Georges joke shop and got the essentials to sneak into school. Harry did not get much because Fred and George would not let him pay for anything because Harry gave them the money to buy the store. As Ron was paying at the register George cam up to Harry and said, “I’ve got something to show you,” he grabbed his wrist and showed him to the front of the store. He pointed to a plack. The plack wrote “Dedicated to Harry Potter”. Animated plack is it, then?
“Yep let’s go,” they responded. They said good bye to the twins and walked outside. They saw a large crowd of boys by the broom store, but couldn’t tell what they were circling. The sun, of course. They left the store which they already left and went to finish there shopping. They meet up with Mr. and Mrs. Weasley at the coffee shop. Mr. Weasley asked Harry if he could have a quick word.
“Of course” he followed Mr. Weasley into the back room. The back room was just a small storage room with a back exit.
“Harry, McGonagall told me that you requested access to the secrete More acid for the Sue! passage way that leads to Sirius’ old house. I am asking you to only use this passage in emergencies. This is for your own safety Harry.”
“That’s fine but, I know how to take care of myself, Mr. Weasley” Harry said respectfully but with a little anger in his tone.
“It is not that I don’t think you can’t take care of yourself because I’d be wasting my breath. You have proven that many times to the whole wizarding world. But you are very important to me and the rest of the order so we want to keep you safe.” He said, ended his exposure to this fic with a reassuring not long now, Harry. Soon you’ll be ensnared by Her smile, and walked back into the coffee shop.
As Harry was just about to exit he heard the back door swing open. A girl rushed in shut the door. She must not have noticed Harry because after she shut the door, she leaned her back against it and shut her eyes “This place is so cool!” and gave small, girlish squeal. All the action happens in backrooms!
Harry, knowing the second she opened her eyes she would see him, made his presents Ahhh, he hasn’t even met her yet, and already he’s bought her stuff! known by loudly clearing his throat.
The girl opened her eyes and blushed, “O, I’m sorry I did not see anyone”.
“It’s fine” Harry said. Harry saw that she was very pretty. One of the prettiest girls he ever saw. Then his eyes were sporked out. By this point she was looking at the ground a little embarrassed. “I’m Harry, Harry Potter” Harry said holding out his hand.
When she heard him announce his name her eyes moved from the floor to his forehead in shock. And stuck there. Harry was so used to this he didn’t mind. He’s had a lot of experience wiping eyes off his forehead. He just hated the slime that got stuck to his hands. The fact that she was a very attractive girl didn’t bother him either. He had learned to live with his reputation; he really didn’t have another choice.
“And you are”, he asked. Good thing you said so, I don’t see a question-mark.
“O, umm, Anastasia”
“Umm, are you visiting, London?” Pay attention, she just said her name was Anastasia.
“Not exactly, I am staying here for a little while; I actually am attending Hogwarts next week. Umm, I will be with the seventh grades, I was told” But of course.
“You are, so am I?” Harry asked. He’s been held back for sixth year, to tell the truth. He has never had a new class mate at Hogwarts. The only classmates he had at Hogwarts were those that he started out with as a first year. No. Doesn’t he remember the legions of Sues?
“Yes, umm, long story, but I am staying with Professor McGonagall at Hogwarts currently and she is giving me lessons, so I can master six years of wizardry in one month. I lost her in a big crowd. I need to get back to her, I am sorry to bother, I really am but can you find her for me and tell her I am in here. I know it is a lot to ask and I do not want to be a bother, but everywhere I go a thousand teenage boys come up to me and ask me questions. Weird, huh?” Harry now knew what the crowds of his male classmates where looking at all day. Like him, they have never meet any other wizarding girls that did not attend Hogwarts already. Because they also suffer from memory-loss, and don’t remember the TriWizard-tournament. And Brits never leave their island.
“No, problem at all, I am in no hurry, but you don’t have to wait in here it’s dirty and hot, just how Sues like you prefer things to be. Put this on,” Harry pulled his invisibility cloak and gave it to Anastasia. *blows gasket.* It’s one of his most prized possessions, and he not only show it to someone he just met, but lends it to her to boot? Just let her get stampeded by hordes of hormonal teenage boys!
*snip.* He gets her back to McGonagall, shows to the entire coffeeshop he has an Invisibility Cloak, gets told she’s the daughter of the President, and thinks he doesn’t stand a chance with such a beautiful girl. He didn’t angst this much about girls since Cho. Next day they get on the train to Hogwarts. Because it makes sense they go to school a month early.
Harry and Hermione sat and waited for McGonagall in the head cabin on the train. *snip* “What’s Hogwarts without Dumbledore” Harry accidentally said out loud stopping the laughter.
“I do very much miss Albus” said McGonagall. Professor Dumbledore when talking to students, thank you very much.
There was a silence for a bout a minute.
“Where is Anastasia,” Hermione asked interrupting the silence.
“O, she is already at Hogwarts; she’s been there the last two weeks”
“The time turner helped a little” she added. Can’t have Hermione be the only one to use it, can we?
It must be because she comes from an amazing family, her father is the President of the United States” McGonagall said in excitement. Which is relevant, how? How does holding an office mean his daughter is gifted in magic?
Now I know I don’t have a chance with her, Harry thought Wait I already decided no girl friends. So stop whining about it.
“The President? That is fantastic!” Hermione replied ”I’m like, so easily impressed, and I totally forgot that I’ve been told yesterday as well!”
“Yes, yes, it truly is. She told me it is hard to be the first daughter because everyone treats her over special, like your first days at Hogwarts Harry, but I told her their was no need to worry about that hear because power in the muggle world does not make a difference to us. Hence why I go on about her being First Daughter. But I did not know just being American would draw attention to people! “Of course it does. So few Americans ever come to England.” There is know Wizarding School in America, the wizards go to Canada, the school is called Harrington School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. ”How does this even make sene in a country the size of the US? No Wizarding schools, apart from one in Canada? Bwuh?” They could not force Anastasia to go because there were always too many muggles around her to use magic. ”Like this has stopped other magic-users. Especially when magic first begins to out itself.” They believe you can not force a wizard to go to school. This was not a written school rule because no one has ever turned down the path of magic. But Anastasia’s father did. America is not our category but Dumbledore could not let a child follow the wrong path. He found a way to find her alone with her father. The father would no allow it. Dumbledore knew he was the President. He knew if he persisted the President would take it to the muggle media and we did not want that. ”And the father would not be found unfit for office on grounds of insanity if he continued ranting about magic.”He got very upset and never really brought it up. We found in his diary that he planned to ask again and train her so she would be able to attend her last year; he knew she would pick it up fast. Dumbledore always had faith in people. He saw peoples talents and showed them how to use them to the best of there ability” she paused, thinking of Dumbledore, “I was not going to let his vision fail”
*snip.* Hermione gets mad with Harry for upsetting McGonagall and leaves the cabin.
Hermione was walking down the main hallway and turned her head to see if Harry was coming. The train was basically empty except for her and Harry. they’ve not arrived yet. Where did the other students go? She turned fully around and waited for Harry. When he did not come she turned back around and bumped into Draco Malfoy! * bhow* Her face filled with terror as she stepped back. She stopped walking back as she bumped into a railing. She did not say a word, she was two scared. Scared, and scareder. Anyway, why is she scared? She can fight off ferret-boy, she’s done so before.
“You look happy to see me mudblood” he said with an evil smirk on his face. “So happy you’re speechless! I am sorry but it would never work out between us, you see I am a pureblood, you are a mudblood trash. Or in muggle terms, the king or the nobles,” he pointed at him, “would never have any relations with a peasant” he then poked his pointer finger at her shoulder. As he pulled his hands away Hermione grabbed his wrist, pulled his sleeve up, and revealed his deatheater mark. She threw his arm away in disgust. At that moment he grabbed her banged her into the wall, leaned over her with his hands on both sides of her blocking her escape and said “I am not, or never will be a deatheater. I will be attending Hogwarts this year, McGonagall approved it. Why? Well it’s none of your business you filthy little mudblood!” Young love. Seriously, I put ten Galleons on thse two snogging before the story is over.
At that moment Harry came in to the hall way, drew his wand out and Malfoy went flying into the wall. Before he could reach his wand Harry was standing over him with his wand in Malfoy’s face.
“That is enough Mr. Potter” yelled McGonagall running down the hall
“Students may not attack other students”
“I am not attacking another student I am attacking a deatheater!” Harry said, wand still in his face.
“That is where you are mistaking Mr. Potter” Mistaking Malfoy for Potter? Oh, ZING!
“No, he almost killed Dumbledore last year and then he ran off with Snape and didn’t invite me for their wedding. Bastards!” Harry yelled.
“Harry, we have no proof he tried to kill him, he told me,”
“Look at his wrist he has the dark mark!” Hermione interrupted, that was the first time she interrupted a teacher. …it is? When did Hermione turn into a sycophant?
ETA: She decided it was around a half of an hour so she flew by McGonagall’s open window to see if she was working. She instead found her petting Dumbledore’s old bird. Mind, meet gutter. This is wrong on oh so many levels.
